by Ray Sanchez 11.25.13
I don’t believe it. Readers are still clamoring for my crystal ball’s predictions on UTEP basketball despite its disastrous prediction about the Miners’ football team. It predicted the Miners would win nine games and they’ll be lucky if they wind up with three.
I didn’t want anything to do with the obnoxious orb anymore but what could I do? I can’t disappoint its followers so I hesitantly opened the drawer and took it out.
NATURALLY it greeted me with its customary snarl. “What took you so long?” it said. “Basketball is already underway.”
I decided I wouldn’t let it get away with anymore gruff. “Listen,” I said, “you’re lucky I’m talking to you at all after what you predicted for the UTEP football team. That was the most horrible prediction I’ve ever heard.”
Boy, did the orb straighten up. It said, “What are you talking about? Can’t a crystal ball make a mistake now and then? How about all the great predictions I’ve given you in past years? Man, I’ve been right on the button year after year then just one little goof and you jump on me.”
I RETORTED, “Little? That was a gigantic mistake. I mean, it might even be a world record.”
“Hey, if it was, I wasn’t alone.” it replied. “I saw you take a survey of other oracles and nearly all of them said the Miners were going to have a winning season, too. Only that fellow called Charles Hill predicted the Miners would have a lousy season.”
Then, believe it or not, it actually sobbed as if it was going to cry. I almost felt sorry for it. I said almost.
Anyway, I changed the subject. “Okay, okay. Tell me about the UTEP basketball team. How is it going to do this season? And please be a little more careful about what you say. Don’t get so doggone outlandish.’
THE ORB seemed to relax. “Okay, here it goes. I was about to get excited about the Miners basketball team but darn I it, they go and lose to New Mexico State. Yeah, yeah, I know the Aggies have had a good team the last two seasons but hey, I thought the Miners were going to put up a better battle.
“Not that I’m giving up on the Miners. Boy do they have height. That Matt Willms is 7 feet 1 and shows a lot of potential. And John Bohannon at 6 feet 11 has shown more improvement. They have another promising 6 foot 11 player and with an assortment of other shorter but fine players, especially Julian Washburn, well, they could very well get to the playoffs.”
MY EYEBROWS raised about an inch. “You’re predicting the Miners will make the playoffs? There you go again, blowing your mind.”
It said, “Why not? We’ve been expecting a lot from coach Tim Floyd and I think he’ll deliver this season.”
I didn’t pressure it anymore. I’d given it enough of a hard time. I picked it up and put it back in its drawer.
TRIVIA QUESTION: When did UTEP play University of Texas at Austin for the first time in football and what was the score? Answer at end.
OUR DEEPEST condolences to Armando Gutierrez, former coach and El Paso Independent School District athletic director. His beloved wife, Elvira, passed away this past week. She was a lovely person in every way. She’ll be welcomed in heaven with open arms.
ANSWER to trivia question: 1930 at Austin. The Longhorns won, 28-0. It was the Miners’ only loss that season. They finished 7-1-1.